Category Archives: What is God like?

Boundaries

So ISIS beheaded another 21 people–Egyptians–this week. In the name of God? I think not. The one before that was an American woman. Before that burning the Jordanian pilot. They are going for reaction and intimidation. Notice how tall their black-clad executioners are compared to their victims. They are going for fear. It brings up some important questions:

How could they possibly think a God who died for freedom would approve? Or is that why they hate Christians–because we believe in a God who died to guarantee our freedom? Are these guys so demented that they actually think God rules with force? The word demented has ties with “demon” –have they been so pounded on by people who were controlled by demons that their boundaries cracked and they allowed evil to take over?

Were they so powerless, so mistreated as children and became so angry or were so hurt that they chose evil in the form of revenge? They have attracted many such “demented” people. Do they all really think God is like them? Or is this just an excuse to act out their rage?

What caused them to feed such rage? Helplessness? Powerlessness?

Have they thrown off their ties to their own religion in order to vent their fury? Or are they really deluded into thinking they are acting righteously?

I’ve read their holy book, and it says over and over–more than anything else–that Allah is most gracious and most merciful! Where is their disconnect?

I love it when the things I’m thinking and the things I read converge.

I’ve been working on God’s conversation with Cain in Genesis 4 for weeks, and was thinking the above this morning, when I went to God Calling for today. It said to be more afraid of disturbance between God and us than anything.

“When you feel the absolute calm has been broken–away alone with Me until your heart sings, and all is strong and calm. These (disturbances) are the only times when evil can find an entrance. The forces of evil surround the city of man-soul, and are keenly alert for one such unguarded spot, through which an arrow can pierce and do havoc.”

He had my attention; this is just what He had said to Cain! Then He said something shocking! “Remember all that you have to do is to keep calm and happy. God does the rest.”

What? No word about choice? It is only implied, but what a choice it is! And I know you experience it–when someone treats you meanly or rudely, or worse, scares you to death. And you choose not to let their arrows, poisoned by the dark side, go in.

Is that even possible?

It is! Listen to the rest: “No evil force can hinder My Power–only you yourself have power to do that.”

I think the next words are going to be about choosing because that’s what He’s talking about. But no–the last line is, “Think when all God’s mighty forces are arrayed to aid you–and your poor, puny self impedes their onward march.” He’s talking about how our emotions like fear and hurt get triggered. grabbed, and we run away with the wolves instead of sounding the battle cry, “Onward! Fight!”

There is a fight, a holy war, going on, but it isn’t about us killing each other, it’s about us choosing calm or trust and letting God fight for us. God’s boundary is our freedom, our boundary is not hooking in, not letting ourselves get carried away by fear, or hurt, or desire for revenge  but knowing our Helper and choosing to use His forces.

Right after that I read Psalm 4 and it’s all about the same thing! Wow! The last line is “Now I will lie down in peace, and sleep; for thou alone, O Lord, makes me live unafraid.”

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Got Love? If you are alone today…

Valentines Day–the day we celebrate love–happens to fall on the same day I celebrate God, but then I’m growing into doing that every day.

So, of course you’ve got love today, but do you know it? Are you living in it? Letting it lift you? Letting it nourish you? Celebrating it?

God’s love is as available to you as air! Truly! There is only one requirement, you have to want it.

And it is the sweetest, most affirming, most knowing love you have ever had or could have. God loves you wildly. More than you love your children. More than your parents love you. More than your greatest infatuation.

How do I know this? Because I am experiencing it, and it is truly amazing. I thought I grew up loved, and yet I have such incredible love deficits that sometimes I think I don’t know how to give or receive love at all. But I am learning. I am discovering how to accept, how to receive love, how to let myself be loved.

Sounds easy, doesn’t it? I find that it’s not. God has been teaching me to be still and know Him.

We all long for love, but we are not good at it.

We aren’t even good at loving ourselves. Many of us grew up believing it wasn’t right, even. Yet Jesus said God’s law was summed up in “love God with your whole being and your neighbor as yourself.” Don’t love yourself? Can’t love your neighbor.

This past week I said to a client, “When you are loving yourself, who are you working with? God? or His enemies?”

It was a new thought to her. It often is. God loves you, so naturally wants you to love you too. It makes His work easier.

Our problem is getting confused. We think negativity about us is a good thing. We also think loving us is a soft thing. Not true. While kindness is very important, sometimes hard love is the best love you can give yourself. Hard love as in discipline–not eating that extra piece of cake, getting up to exercise because your mind and body work better. Stopping long enough to imagine the situation from your children’s eyes. Fasting 40 days from chocolate, or at least sugar.

But the most important thing is the hardest: Sitting still long enough to let God love you. Sitting still, purposely, just to be in His presence. Even ten minutes to start is good. Breathe and count 7 seconds in and 7 seconds out. Listen to your breathing. Invite God to be with you, to speak to you, to tune you to His voice. But don’t worry if you don’t hear Him, just be with Him. Know that He wants to be with you 1000 times more than you want to be with Him!

And His love is not just like the best Father or Mother you can imagine. It is a lover’s love as well. So whatever kind of love you need, He has it all for you. All you have to do is ask. You do have to want it. He waits for your invitation. Just ask Him to meet you.

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Why are You Afraid of God?

One thing really came home to me last weekend. Nothing that God is involved in can be bad, whether it is death or anything else. It might seem or feel bad, but His presence (Love) is such pure energy, even sad, hard things are filled with joy–such sweet bonding and connections came from the weekend of Rocky’s funeral. It was a celebration of her life: beautiful, inspiring and uplifting. I felt honored to be related.

How did we get so afraid of God?

Was it, as I have heard in therapy, that God didn’t answer childhood prayers the way we thought He should? One teenage girl prayed for her family as a child, and it came apart anyway, so she had no use for Him after that. She didn’t understand freedom.

Maybe, even as adults, we (like her) don’t understand that God doesn’t take away other people’s freedom to hurt us. Freedom is much more scary than God! But even that is tempered by His keeping power if you ask to be kept. He isn’t willing for anyone to lose his or her true self, even though you might suffer.

I wonder how many of us have been scared away from God by church teaching. The church has been very effective with marketing guilt, and a harsh, exacting picture of God. They haven’t done a good job of interpreting scripture. Not that there isn’t some support for fear there.

God has had to leave hooks for doubt in scripture so we are free to choose. People wrote what God communicated but often it was mixed with there own perspective, mixed with their own fear, guilt, anger–and not a clear understanding of God. Sometimes they were very close to God and knew Him well, but we bring our own fear etc. to their words, and misread.

For this reason I’ve decided to continue with Love’s Playbook II going through the Bible writing it as God’s love story. Making Him look as He really is–all good–a God of love. I’m about four chapters in and loving it. I can’t think too far ahead or I get overwhelmed.

But one thing I’ve realized is that early on I will have to deal with God’s wrath. I think our main problem with God (besides just wanting to do our own thing) is not understanding his wrath or anger. It’s a lot different from ours. And if we can get the very scariest part of God nailed down, you can’t help but see where we went off track, and why understanding wrath is so important.

This might surprise you, but according to the major Old Testament prophets, God’s wrath is letting go. Letting you do what you want when what you want is destructive to yourself and others. . .when God steps back the dark side steps in and it gets really scary. Not always right at the beginning, because they don’t want to scare you back to God, but they hate us and their self-control isn’t good.

God’s worst, worst wrath is when He comes into your presence with you unprepared because pure energy combusts disordered atoms. This doesn’t happen often because His self-control is very good. It did happen a few times with warning, but one day He will come here and whatever is out of harmony will go poof in flame and disappear for ever, but it won’t burn forever–big difference.

Everyone will have had the chance to choose being loved by God or doing your own thing. He won’t force you to love, and He will give you your way, but your way is fantasy, because you have no power against evil or the dark side. If you don’t choose love, they will take over. You live in a war zone.

That is scary, but God isn’t.

 

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Perspective on Death

My niece Rocky died peacefully in her sleep this morning at 5:00.(Monday) And since I process mostly through writing, and I will be gone when this posts this weekend, I wanted to at least start it today.

I have fluctuated between emptiness and praise today. The emptiness is wondering why I didn’t take more advantage of the time I could have spent talking with her, and getting together with her…

The praise is knowing her suffering is over, and because she went so sweetly, she got her healing–she didn’t even know she died. Her next conscious thought will be in total wonderful health and seeing her beloved Jesus. She’s as good as there.

Right up until the day before she died she told her Mom she needed less company so she could pray and meditate. She didn’t want anything to come between her and Jesus so he could heal her. Sweet.

I had an interesting thought after that. It must have been hard for Jesus to raise Lazarus from the dead knowing he would have to suffer living here and die again!

I’m sure he was glad he could do it for the sisters! But I think God must be happy when His children are safe, secure out of harms way, asleep, as Jesus said, waiting for Him to wake them.

Would I want to bring Rocky back? Yes, for myself. But for her to go through all this again? No!

Death isn’t the same to God as to us. It seems He works harder to keep people alive who haven’t yet had a chance to see Him as the love He really is–to make a choice based on good information.

When my little brother died, God gave me the scripture: “Precious in the eyes of the Lord is the death of His children…” That was when I began to understand God’s perspective. And I don’t even believe we go straight to heaven.

I have no problem with people comforting themselves with the belief that their loved ones are in heaven. It seems like a sweet doctrine. I just can’t support it from scripture. There are two, maybe three passages that seem to support it, if you tweak them that way.

My resistance to believing it is simple, and based on two things:

1) There is a preponderance of scripture for believing we are “asleep” until Jesus wakes us: from Genesis to Revelation, including Jesus’ own words, the words of his disciples, and the whole doctrine of the resurrection.*

2) I know how the dark side loves to deceive, Satan is a master at deception, and who would disagree with someone they love “coming back from the dead? They could tell them anything–any lies, and they would believe them. It happened in scripture, and it happens today. It’s a perfect stage for the enemy’s lies. Grieving people are targets for it, and they have no protection if they want it and believe in it.

I think that is scary, and I see us getting set up for a huge deception, just because we want to believe something sweet that isn’t true.

You might say, “But everyone believes it!” as someone said to me a couple of days ago.

I know! The enemy has been working hard on this one for a long time–since Eden. It must be very important to his final strategy.** He’s been very successful with it becoming a doctrine, getting the church to promote it! That ought to give us pause, to make us question it.

So there it is. Now it’s up to you. God doesn’t want you deceived.

 

*Genesis 3:4, 19, Luke 8, John 11, *Thessalonians 4:15-18 are just a sample of them

**2Thessalonians 2:5-12

 

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Filed under A God perspective, a perspective on evil, Becoming real, Grief, Uncategorized, What is God like?

A Perspective on Perspective

I promised to answer questions I raised about suffering with the last blog, so for those who are interested: here are my answers. And my disclaimer is don’t take my word, search it out for yourself. This represents 50+ years of Bible study, but you need to know for yourself, asking God’s Spirit to teach you.

Perspective is a very flexible, subjective thing. Beauty and wisdom are in the eyes of the beholder. We don’t have to come to consensus, but you might think if we have the same teacher, we would.

If we could see all the variables God sees, we would be amazed and overwhelmed. But this has helped me understand a sliver of why my brother wasn’t healed in answer to his sisters’ prayers.

If he had been healed, just to watch his baby girl (now 44) die from cancer, it would have been over-the-top pain. She was the one who sat by his bed the last week of his life.

But why not heal her? My religion shows and teaches Jesus healing everyone who asked. Even now Jesus heals those who ask, but not always in their time frame.

He’s promised to heal, He’s promised to answer, but not necessarily now. And not at our demand. Because like a loving and faithful parent, he sometimes says “Wait a while,” and other times He says “No” because His wisdom sees ahead.

However, He has supplied some examples of changing His “no” to yes with disastrous results because someone cried and asked Him to.

The story of Hezekiah* is one of these. He became very ill, and God sent Isaiah to tell him that he would not recover. Now Hezekiah was one of the best kings Israel ever had. He brought tremendous reforms, and did wonderful things, and God honored him–even defeating Sennacherib and the whole Assyrian army when they threatened Israel.

Because he had been so faithful to God, he cried to God and used his record of faithfulness as reason God should heal him. And so God did. He even gave him a sign that he would recover that got the attention of the secular nations around.

But when ambassadors came asking about it, Hezekiah’s faith failed him. He didn’t talk about God or his healing. He showed them what he knew they could relate to–treasure. And they did–they came back and got it.

But that isn’t the worst. During the extra 15 years given to Hezekiah, his son Manasseh was born–one of the worst kings, if not the worst, Israel ever had. He took Israel away from God for 40 years, and undid all the work of his father. It was the beginning of the end that led to being conquered. So what do you think? Was that just so we could read about it and learn to trust His “no”?

If we can get to the place of trusting God–just believing He is all good, and knows what is best, we would be happier. We would be a lot less confused and more relaxed. We don’t know what He sees, what He knows, so knowing Him becomes the only thing we can depend on. He is the loving, all-wise parent.

I’ve been trying to understand what life is all about for 55 years, and in the last ten, two things have become very clear: God is all good and He’s not afraid to suffer and die, and even though He hates suffering and death, He’s not afraid to let us suffer and die. He sees death very differently than we do.

But that’s for next time.

Chronicles 29-32

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The Hard and Soft Side of Love

I have a friend who is struggling with his son constantly pushing the limits, always testing, needing someone who cares enough to set and hold limits.

My friend’s fear? That he will ruin his kid–who will grow up hating his father if he disciplines too much. He loved his dad who disciplined him–it’s not coming from there. His wife is overly soft–she may have gotten to him.

I repeatedly assure him that limits are where security comes from–knowing that someone cares enough to fight with you because you are worth it. Also knowing that someone bigger and trustworthy is in charge.

I’ve written about this so-necessary side of love before;  it is something parents really struggle with today.

This morning, sitting with God, it occurred to me that my insecurity comes from the same place.

I desperately want to know I can relax and be the carefree child growing up in an atmosphere of complete trust. Knowing One greater than me is in control overseeing like a loving parent, careful to filter out all truly bad things, but allowing those I need for my own development.

My own parents were permissive. And unfortunately I, too, passed it on.

So I know where it came from, but why is this so hard for me to get? I mean really “get.” I know it intellectually. But to have it in my cells–every one of them–so I can trust this God I call Father. The one I get up to sit with just because I want to be in His Presence, because I want to soak in His love and feel it, because I want it to heal me so I can relax and be me–no thought, no effort, just be.

I want to live loving everything, confident that whatever is allowed in my life has been filtered by the gentlest hand and I can accept it with confidence and grace, knowing I am loved.

I saw Exodus over the holidays, and I didn’t like their picture of God any more than the one in Noah. Ugh, they were both portrayed as distant, uncaring, vengeful. I suppose they want to make Him look strong. But can’t God be strong and not vengeful? Can’t He be pictured as involved and not codependent?

I think so. I’m not too far from parents today who want there kids to have all good things. But I KNOW that isn’t going to make them happy. Happiness comes from inside. From making choices, sometimes hard ones, from knowing you’ve done the right thing even when it isn’t easy. I know we all need our pain, and we are hard-wired for struggle, but truth be told, I want a God who is all sweetness and light.

Or do I?

I want a God who is strong enough to deal with evil. One who is strong enough to protect me and those I love. One who is wise enough to guide me through the things I need to learn to grow up.

I want a God strong enough to deal with evil–to eradicate suffering and pain. I want a God good enough to know my true heart, as well as the hearts of those I love. I want a God much, much bigger than me, who is totally trustworthy.

I want a God who is all good, but strong enough to do the hard stuff that needs to be done.

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Good from Bad

Have you had the experience yet of something wonderful coming from something you thought was horrible?

Christmas is tied to such a memory. Arriving at an airport 30 minutes before my flight was scheduled to leave, I had checked-in before I left, so thought I’d have no problem. It was an unfamiliar airport but still no problem. Until I looked for my boarding pass and couldn’t find it. No text. No email.

“You’ll have to go to the kiosk and check in,” the agent said.

“But I don’t have time,” I replied.

“Sure you will, it’s right over there,” she waved in its direction.

I went and the kiosk said, “It’s too late to check in for this flight.”

I started to panic. I walked around all the ticketing lines up to the desk and said, “The kiosk is saying I can’t check in for my flight.”

“What time is your flight?” she asked, and when she heard said, “It is too late; you have to check in 30 minutes ahead.” I had bucked line, there was no point in wailing, “But I did check in!”

An agent came up and said, “You have to get in line,” as I fought back tears. Normally I don’t care about a few extra hours, but this time I wanted to get home.

A couple of minutes later I remembered that God can bring good from anything and thanked him that I had missed my flight. Not yet feeling thankful, I went back to the kiosk and checked in for a new flight two hours later. But I wasn’t satisfied and stood in the special helps line. It didn’t move, and a thought persistently came: Go to the gate.

It seemed silly, but finally I went. My plane was still on the ground but they had just closed the door, and for some reason I went to the next gate which was also leaving for my connecting city ten minutes later. I asked if I could still make my connection.

The agent said, “I don’t know but I  can get you on this flight if you want.” And just like that she printed a new boarding pass and I was on the plane.

Arriving at my connection I was intent to see if my flight was still there. It had gone and I had to wait almost three hours. I found another flight but they were oversold and asking for volunteers. Disappointed but resigned, I called my husband about the three hour-delay. He was gracious and I settled in to wait.

I finally got on the plane–an aisle seat on a 747 (!)–by a good-natured 13 year-old boy.

Then his dad came and asked me to trade with his sister so they could sit together. I can’t deny I was the tiniest bit irritated underneath my good-natured cooperation.

Bella was 83 and last to board, and got to my traded aisle seat just before me. I got the window seat. I don’t mind window seats, but…

We were both exhausted and planning to sleep. She had just flown in from Belgium so to her it was midnight. She was trying to sleep when the food cart came, and I was reading. She invited me to share her “picnic” and soon we realized we were kindred spirits.

I’ve met many great people on planes and would like to stay connected, but the persistent present closes over pleasant people who become pleasant past experience.

What made the difference with Bella?

Maybe it was her wonderful attitude toward life, compliments of cheating death after a heart attack nine years earlier. Maybe we had so much in common except that she didn’t believe in God. That usually isn’t a plus for me, but she was so open and authentic in her disregard. Maybe it was her openness to hearing me reframe her choice to live after her heart attack as choosing God because God=Life.

Whatever it was, four and a half hours later, I felt I had made a friend for life. Thank you, God, for getting me on that plane, in that seat.

I was trying to have a good attitude about a series of mistakes. God had a bigger perspective.

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Graciousness is for Growth

Wonder why you’re conflicted? Actually, I think it’s a sign of growth.

It starts when we are little–about 18 months old–and we realize we can go away from Mommy. I am separate. I am another person!

And I run away–into the other room even. And sometimes I can stay away a whole 30 minutes before I have to run back and make sure Mommy is still there where I left her. If I come back and can’t find her, I start to get panicky.

Individuation, as it’s called, is a life-long process. We have to separate from our parents, our family, and our system to grow up. Becoming autonomous is very important to maturity–the opposite of codependency: What do I think? What do I believe? as opposed to, What do they think?

And herein lies conflict. We have a developmental task to become us–autonomous, separate, individual, and so it should be, no two of us are the same. But then we grow up to discover that we are completely dependent on God for life!

A fact that’s hard for some of us to believe and accept. And yet if you pull back the curtain and don’t doctor history, it isn’t hard to see. We are part of entropy. We tend toward disorganization and decay, even though we fight it. We are all dying–some of us faster than others. So unless God calls us friend, and rescues us from it, it’s over when your heart stops.

Even if we don’t fight each other (which we most always do), we’re fighting dependency. Am I strong enough to disagree? Will there be a fight? Will they retaliate? Will they leave if I say what I think? Will they still like me? love me? Maybe it’s safer to keep quiet.

Or the other side: Can I love you when you are so different from me? When you disagree with me? When you don’t honor my point-of-view? won’t even hear it? possibly can’t?

What do you do with that? How can you reconcile such disparate and conflicting needs? You can’t just take on other people’s beliefs and grow.

We are never going to think the same about everything. We aren’t built that way.  We don’t do well in isolation either; we need each other.

But we can learn to accept that we are all broken–all mistake makers–all dependent on God first, for love and security. And we can carry on learning to listen, respect, and disagree graciously.

But doesn’t God demand compliance? Don’t we have to agree with Him on everything if we are His friend?

No! He only insists on two things: that you love love (as opposed to hate and destruction) and that you agree He is God and you are not. Inside of that you will never run out of possibilities for differences.

If no two people are alike, or think alike, what are the chances that God is threatened by differences? I don’t think there is any chance.

I believe God wants us to grow up–and that means differences. He obviously loves variety.

If you subscribe, as I do, to the belief that God is NOT both good and evil, but that He is all good, then force is not part of His character. He can love you wildly, and still honor your choice to walk away forever–even knowing you will lose everything…

So sometimes He allows evil to show us it’s true nature to let us know choices are important.

He does, however insist on graciousness, even when setting firm boundaries. It’s how He can tolerate so much difference. As long as you aren’t supporting death and destruction, you’re good, and your differences are all good and welcome. He will listen.

He will even teach us how to be gracious so we can allow differences without wanting to kill each other.

But that might be why He set the lifespan at 120! For some, it might take that long.

 

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What do You Choose?

Today is my grandson’s 10th birthday! Do you  remember when you were ten?

What did you want then?

What do you want now?

Maturity is summed up as learning to think differently in the letter of mental health (Philippians–which is also the book of joy!)

When you are ten you think as a child. Though I would imagine that the last three years have not been normal child thinking for my birthday boy–lots of adjustment–going through separation, divorce, and a new step-dad (whom he adores). Those would be seismic changes in a ten-year-old life.

But you might find it interesting that they (all three boys) prayed that he (specifically) would come for at least 6 months before he did. And then it all happened very fast (they had known each other for years) and the boys were all delighted and couldn’t wait to live with him!

That is not the way it usually happens I can tell you!

But they had always been coached that God would take care of them and they were going to be ok. And when they wondered why “their friend” didn’t come around anymore they were told to pray for him, and so they did–every night.

They weren’t at all upset when they came home from a vacation with Daddy and Grandpa and Grandma, and a surprise! Mommy was married and they were moved into their new dad’s house!

I know because they face-timed me and showed me their new rooms, singing, “We live here, we live here!” I think even their dad was relieved.

What a great illustration for learning to think differently! Situations that would normally be horrible were made tolerable, even hopeful, because God was in them working all things together for good.

Isn’t that confidence, that joy, that hope, what you want to live in?

Of course it helps if you have a parent that tells you more than once a week that everything is going to be ok, especially when you are two, five, and seven.

But you do, really, and it doesn’t matter if you are 22, or 45, or 67. He still wants to be your Daddy and tell you that everything is going to be ok, that He is working it all together for your good.

I know, that’s in Romans, not Philippians, but it is what Philippians is all about: You can choose to rejoice, and the more you rejoice the better you will feel because your confidence will grow and you will feel loved and cared for.

But what about when you don’t feel loved and cared for? Then you choose. Because choosing is an act of your will based on what you want, not what you feel. Remember, feelings follow thought and action.

If you want to feel better, think better. Make some good choices, some healthy choices, follow through and you will feel better. It’s a law of the mind.

Hey, this is a great place to make a plug for my new book–the real reason I’m late writing this week–it’s coming out any day now! Love Losing is how to have a healthy mind and body because you can choose to think differently.

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Brain Robbers

I’m restless this afternoon–probably dehydrated, I reflect–could the news from my friend put me in this funk? Don’t I believe God is good? I say it enough…so I should just start thanking Him that He has this too. And I’m sure He does. So I drink two glasses of water and began to write here. That’s one of my best processing strategies.

Did you know stress doesn’t kill us? There is now a great body of research to show it (Cohen, 2006). It is the state your body is in when the stress hits. Are you healthy? What do you do with the fear that presents itself with bad news? What are your feedback systems? What are your patterns? How do you cope?

We are emotional creatures. There is no way around it. We’re built to feel. We have to have outlets for emotions and pain. Fear is real when you hear a good friend has just been exposed to Ebola. No the fear isn’t for me–he’s in another country. The fear is for him and his family. It’s worse than hearing someone here has cancer–and that is bad enough.

And no, I’m not afraid of death for people who know God, their pain is over. I feel for the people who are left. The ones who suffer. I’m not afraid his wife and three children will get the disease–they are here. But how awful it would be to go on without him–he’s so full of life and fun. Humor is his second nature, as is adventure, and faith.

Sooner or later everyone comes around to the question. Why do good people suffer? Or Why does God allow suffering? Does He cause it? Those two have made many atheists.

I’m clear on both. Why is there suffering? Freedom. And no, He doesn’t cause suffering. He has no evil. So what’s my problem?

Part of it is the pathways I have. Fear used to be second nature to me. That network–mostly dormant is still there–ready to be activated at any time. Another part is that I know God sees what we don’t, and sometimes He sees that it is better not to intervene. I admit that one still gets me nervous from time to time. Faithful suffering speaks.

So what is the real problem? Do I know Him well enough to ask Him and listen for His voice? Do I take my shocks and fears to Him? Can I trust that He really knows best if He doesn’t do what I think He should? I am shocked to realize that I haven’t talked to Him about this yet!

Why not? I got caught in feeling–in the awfulness and emotion of what happened. That is purely human. But I could have turned to him immediately instead of wallowing in feelings for two hours. Now that is crazy! 

One of my friends even said the right words, but they went by with my agreement but not my action–not connecting with Him about this.

I even talked to Him about something else! Wow! I’m amazed.

Fear does NOT come from God. But neither will He jerk it away from me. I have to want to give it up. Processing helps. Can I trust Him? His goodness? Really?

Yes! Will I? That is my choice.

 

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Filed under A God perspective, Grief, Joy, Love ed, Mental Health, suffering, Uncategorized, What is God like?