Listen to this, “My nature is to bless. Your nature is to receive with thanksgiving. This is a true fit, designed before the foundation of the world. Glorify me by receiving my blessings gratefully.”*
This is God talking. What a great recipe for life! Receiving God’s love and blessings gratefully. What has gone wrong?
Two things: if we are raised with that belief, we can begin to think we are “all that” and life turns around us–we never grow out of being the center of the universe. (Yes, there is a time for a natural narcissism. Before the age of seven it develops your security to believe you are so loved.) Ideally, you grow out of it–it just makes you a loving and gracious person, aware of God’s love with the ability to give it.
If we didn’t get that experience before seven, we constantly try to find it–usually in all the wrong places and all the wrong ways. We struggle with insecurity–needing people to prove their love.
These two have a myriad of spin offs on a spectrum reaching from personality disorders to addictions to poor coping styles. Usually being raised with love is the safest, but it doesn’t guarantee good results. Bad things happen here to all of us. And sometimes we listen to the interpretations that evil whispers to us and agree. Then it becomes part of our belief system. We all have guilt or shame (guilt being better than shame).
Here is the reason. We are broken. And it has taken me a whole lifetime to realize that God doesn’t want us to feel guilt and shame, but to just know that we are broken and go on with acceptance and receive His love anyway!
So you are broken, so is every other person on this planet. The smartest position is to know it, embrace it (which means accepting what God and other trusted loved ones tell you). Also lay down the defenses. If you get uncomfortable feedback about your behavior, look at it squarely. Yes, it will be embarrassing, even painful, but if you know you are loved, you will be strong enough to take it to God asking Him to help you face it and understand it and heal it.
You’ll be amazed at how fast it goes (usually). He loves to heal our hurts and our craziness, more than we want it healed even. And He knows the best, safest and fastest way. You don’t have to be afraid. HE LOVES YOU. And he is faithful. He isn’t going to take you down some needless painful alley. He hates pain, but loves what it does for us. He won’t make you heal, but he gives you opportunities to become more than you are with all the pain. Think about it. He’s safe. And you were made to receive with gratitude.