Narcissism Daily Mirror: Verbal Abuse – Part 2

You see, the first step is to question:  Am I looking at this right?  Is my perception skewed?  Does this make sense that I should be treated like this, and our children should watch?  Narcissists are wounded people who shut down vulnerability early in life because they are afraid of being unloved or abandoned.  They don’t know this and can’t admit it; they usually just bully others.  Kim began to ask the hard questions, and answer them honestly.

“What also helped was the image I had in my mind of a very cheerful, confident but strong and kind nurse. Can you get a picture in your mind of what she looks like? The type that is not going to let you get away with saying you don’t want to take your medicine or avoid the injection? Very organized and efficient, very good at her job and very assertive and grown up. I started becoming this nurse when I needed to take charge.

Because after all, if it is our spouse who is abusive there is usually an enormous amount at stake in our life. Was I going to let the bratty teenager in him rip apart all of the security and peace in my life and tear down my self esteem? Was I going to let this part of him destroy our kids lives? No way. I was going to do whatever I had to do to put that brat in his place!”

via Narcissism Daily Mirror: Verbal Abuse – Part 2.

 

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Perception of Yourself and a Narcissistic Mate can Change Everything

The following is an excerpt from an excellent resource if you are living with a verbally abusive mate.  Kim was living with abuse, her husband Steve, a narcissist.   She was told by therapists to leave because narcissists don’t  change, but they had three children, and that “didn’t  feel right in her heart,” so she sought another opinion.  Today they are helping couples all over the world–together–through their website http://www.narcissismcured.com.  Below is part of her experience, taken from one of her blogs.

Once upon a time I did not think I could possibly stand up to Steve, but then once I had learned to, I could not believe how easy it became. Eventually I saw that it was me who had kept myself his victim by not rising above my own fears. I was scared he was sleeping with other women and would let this thought tear me apart. I would think I needed him to believe in me to believe in myself. I would live to please him and be shattered when my efforts were in vain. I thought I needed him to be trustworthy instead of trusting and relying on myself.

via Narcissism Daily Mirror: Verbal Abuse – Part 2.

Sound familiar? Keep reading, since I took this out of her blog in three different places, it may appear as three different blogs, but one follows the other. And if you have questions feel free to email me at Acaraboolad@gmail.com.